quiteagooddonor | ONE. be curteous and present yourself well

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ONE. be curteous and present yourself well

[The audio turns on and there's a short pause before a moderately young, eager British voice speaks.]

Hello! My name.. Well, it's Tommy D. I'm-- I'm a new warden here.

[His words become more careful.]

I don't-- I don't know if you know about The Cottages or White Castle or anything, but it really doesn't matter that I'm a student of Hailsham. It really made... it makes no difference in the end. [A beat.] I know I'm not the best out there, but if you give me a chance, I'll work hard and I expect I can surprise you.

[A pause and then he's back to his original chipper tone again.]

I heard that the inmates are assigned to us. Is that right? Do I.. Do I talk to the Admiral about it or is it automatic or... ? Sorry. I'm rubbish at this sort of thing. I promise I'll be better once I've gotten to know how it all works.

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Miss Emily told us it's how they live as long as they do and how they never suffer diseases. They replace their organs with organs from us Donors and think nothing of it.

..We're not, though. I mean, we are. We should be. But they don't see us that way. 'Creatures,' Madame called us. 'You poor creatures.'

I don't know who the Previous are. It's the Originals that use the organs.

...That's horrific. And the doctors do this, don't they? This is what they do. and there was me worrying about Comas.

Although, that sounds like something my inmate's here for. You're not creatures. Nobody is. I'd never...

I should explain - my society... Something Happened. We don't know much about what happened before, but things from before are generally considered 'Previous'. Everyone I've met here, with the exception of the one person I know, is Previous.

Only to the Donors. If you're not a Donor, you have nothing to worry about. You're probably an Original if you don't know.

Am I a Previous too then?

...Have these people, the Originals, never heard of you?

Can you see in full colour? That's the easiest way to tell.

I know some of them have. I don't know about the rest.

Yeah.

But those that know about you... they don't like it, right? They can't.

Then you're Previous.

I... don't know whether my society does that. We have other things instead.

But, um. Don't worry. I don't like a lot of things my society does. If anyone here tries to take your... take your organs, I'll find a way to stop them. Me and Jane will.

They don't mind it, I don't think. There was the odd one, like Miss Lucy. But most of them are used to it. They cured diseases with us. No one wants to go back to living like that.

That's a nice way of telling. I sort of wish we had something like that.

I'm not worried about them doing it to me here. I'm worried about them doing it to others. The inmates, maybe.

Jane? Is she your friend?

Well, of course nobody wants to have disease, but... they've got to see that you're people too, right?

It's not as nice as that - we... our entire world was based around who could see what colour and how much. Then I end up here and everyone except me and Jane can see all the colours.

Maybe the people in comas. [adds, almost in a conspiratorial tone] I keep a close eye on the doctors. As much as I can. If I even suspect they're doing it, I'll find a way to bring it down.

Jane's my friend, yes. She's from home.

Not really, no. The way I understood it, they weren't even certain we had souls. That's why they had The Gallery with all our art.

I doubt many people care about that here. I heard rumor once that some Originals couldn't see colors. I don't know if it was true, though. There were a lot of stories told at Hailsham.

If you've only just learned about this, why were you watching them before?

That's lovely. I quite wish I had Ruth or Kath here with me. It would make it easier.

...Do you think that made it easier for them to... use your organs.

Hm. That's interesting. I can see Red, but that's it. Nobody else here is like me and Jane, though.

Because, ah, the equivalent to doctors in my world do... they're responsible for a lot of deaths.

You never know! I was here a few days, and then Jane turned up.

..Probably..

What color does she see? Is it the same? Do you see shades of red or just red or not? Is the rest of it gray or is it black or white or can you not see it at all? Like a.. blindness, it's called?

Doctors don't really seem to be the sort to have any sense of humanity. That's why we had Carers.. to help with our recovery. We never really spoke to the doctors. They just did the procedures and we were less an organ by the end of it.

Yeah, maybe. I don't think Ruth will make it, but Kath could. She might.

Green, but a lot less of it than I do. We see... things in shades of grey, basically, and then one colour, or sometimes two - she can see 12% Blue and 14% Yellow. I can see 86% Red.

So... did doctors in your world have that oath? About not doing harm and things? Someone told me about that. Did you not apply because they didn't believe you were... people? [He sounds like he's shuddering a little.]

I hope she does. It's not fair to be left alone here.

How do you know what percents you see? Do you see the grey tinted in red or is it only grey and red?

I never heard about any oath. We never knew much about the doctors. It wasn't really relevant, since we knew what was going on. We'd move from Hailsham to The Cottages, then begin our Donations and recover in Care Centers. The rest of it didn't really matter. ..We had a good education growing up, of course. I only mean that you never learned much detail about anything unless it was something you took an interest in on your own at The Cottages.

She's alright. She's a Carer, not a Donor... It might be better for her there. Rather than here.

There's a test that you take called an Ishihara when you're twenty. I see the red components of colour; so I can see someone blush, for example.

I suppose if they told you that, you might...

We... learned an ever decreasing amount of things as time went on.

But I don't know what I'd have done without Jane.

What's the Ishihara?

We learned more than most at Hailsham. I thought maybe they told us things the way they did when they did to prevent us from looking at it too hard. But now I know that's only partially true. They told us what they did to do us a favor.

Maybe Kath will come then. She would, if she knew. If she got offered it somehow. [Hear the false hope.]

A test where they show you pictures made up of dots. Differently coloured dots. Depending on what you can see, they work out your colour perception.

Is it really a favour? Is ignorance ever a favour?

I hope she does.

How do they know what colors the dots are if they can't see color themselves?

Yeah. It is.

Me too, Eddie. Thanks.

There's number codes for colours. I presume that's how they know. Or they have an answer key, perhaps.

....

I was never very good at art. It wasn't the colors; I suppose I didn't take it very seriously when I was younger.. and I wasn't very good, you understand. I'm not saying.. My art isn't like your color perception. I only meant that all of us aren't very good at some things -- outside of Kath, maybe. She was good at everything. -- But you shouldn't feel badly about it.

I don't. I never have. In my world, I am very good at seeing colour.

Here... It's only when people try to make me feel bad about it that I do, but even then, I realised that whatever colours I see doesn't really matter.

You're right, it doesn't. If they try to make you feel badly about it again, you should tell them to bugger off. It's not their business anyway.. the colors.. or whatever someone's not good at.

I am good at seeing col...

I already did. If it happens again, I'll say it more forcefully.

Oh, sorry. You are good where you come from you said? Yeah? That's good. Yeah. That's really good.

You do that.

...It's only compared to the Previous that I'm rubbish at seeing colour. Not that it actually matters, but... at home it does matter, that's all.

That's excellent, that you were good there. What about Jane though? It sounds like she wasn't quite as gifted.. or is it number of colors more than the percentages? I barely understand that in our own system. Education, you know.. number of top marks versus the rank of the marks themselves.

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needshumility.livejournal.com - 2011-08-19 22:42 (UTC) - Expand

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quiteagooddonor - 2011-08-19 22:53 (UTC) - Expand

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ONE. be curteous and present yourself well

PRIVATE.. this is a disaster.

Re: PRIVATE.. eddie's paranoias are a breeding ground for this kind of thing. :(

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